Toys for the Small House

Disclaimer: This intention of this post is NOT to guide people in buying gifts for our children.  If you are thinking of buying something for us, please resist the urge and instead come over, share the gift of your company,  and play with us--using the many toys we already have!

Now that that's out of the way: I've been thinking a lot about toys this month.  Which is a change of pace for me.  As a parent, I fail at knowing what the latest and greatest children's toys are.  I don't like shopping, and really despise it when my children are with me--which is always.  In fact, in the last three and a half years I have probably purchased four toys for my boys--and all of these were bought as bribes.

Luckily for Mason and Fergus, other people do get them toys.  Friends and family have been so good to us--total abundance around here. So much, in fact, that I frequently take away bag full of un-touched or over-sized ones to my Mom's house so we can have fresh ones there.

When we downsized, I entered a new toy realm I will call: size concious.  Suddenly we couldn't fit just anything.  We had to be choosy.  So, I started paying attention to what they actually played with.  Maybe this will help you in your gift giving this year for the little ones in your life.  Once again, please don't get our boy's anything--we have more than enough!

Here are some winners:

• Wall Mirror: One of the best things about this is that it employs a very underused space in our house: the bottom 3 feet of the walls.  Plus, the boys love it!  The favorite activity lately has been to "cry" in front of it to see what they look like.  Hilarious!
• Anything that can be and do many different things (thanks, Sarah!)--such as blocks, train tracks, magnets, farm animal sets.
• Blankets and pillows for forts.  This play is just starting for us, but it's really involving for the boys.  And very easy for me to re-incorporate the building materials back into our space.
• Clean laundry and a basket to toss and move around (much to my chagrin, this really is a favorite activity).
• Art supplies and Games.  I put these two together because Mason is just starting to enjoy these.  With Fergus (18mos) they are a disaster.   So, we keep the locked up and try to do them when F is sleeping, otherwise the dog eats a lot of crayons and play-dough.  They store so well, though!  Good space:use ratio.

• Books, books, books. By volume, we commit the most space to books.  I purchased this book rack at a book store going out of business for $25.00.  It only projects 4" off the wall and, once again, only uses the bottom 4 feet of the wall.  Plus, easy for the boys to re-shelve their own books.
• The great outdoors! Snow shovels, sandbox, trees, balls.  Plenty of room outside to keep these!

• Doot-Di-Doos.  These are the long or short cardboard tubes used to loudly announce: "DOOT-DI-DOO!" (Eternal thanks to the Bradley brothers for introducing me to these.)  Not only do the boys love to practice their vocal skills, but also to ride cars through and, god forbid, play swords  with them.  I'll never forget the look on Mason's face when my mom presented him with about 8 of them, all diferent shapes and sizes.  Good gift!
• Lastly, work-related items: sponges to clean, spray bottles, mini brooms, hammers, levels, etc.  You get the picture.  They love to work, and we are happy to oblige!

We wish you all  happy, sane, down-sized holidays!  Come over and check out our mirror and doot-di-do collection! When used together, it is really an amazing performance!

Food Before Floors

What's in your bowl?

A skill I used to enjoy was a keen ability to prioritize.  No more.  I have lost that ability in the slush-pile of our lives.  I have a minor crisis about this daily.  In fact, right after Mason was born, I saw a counselor about the sudden evaporation of my sense of priorities.  "There is so much to attend to--more than one person could ever take care of. What do I do first?"  She gave me really great advice in the form of a parable:

A professor has a cup in his hand.  Next to him on the desk is a pile of rocks, a pile of sand and a bowl of water.  He fills the cup up with the rocks and asks the class, "is the cup full?" 


They reply, "Yes!" 


"Wrong." He commences to add sand to the cup, fulling in the cracks.  "Now is the cup full?" he asks.  


"Yes!" they reply.  


"Wrong." Next he adds water, filling in more gaps again, until the cup really is full.


"What is the lesson?" asks the professor.  


The student in the front row responds, "No matter how full your cup is, you can always add more!" 


"No," says the professor.  "You better put the rocks in first!"

This is a great parable.  One I think about often in the form of "what are my rocks today?"  Of course they are always my people--my family and friends.  I recently had the revelation that I am a rock that needs to go in, too.  Don't know why it took me three years of motherhood to discover that!!

One clear way I care for all of us is with food.  If we don't have good food in our bellies, it's tough to do much else--maintain energy, health or well-being.   I don't show my love with the latest and greatest toys (because I hate shopping), or with money in the college fund (because it's all going somewhere else right now), or by keeping the house clean (because it's truly impossible.) Instead,  I put up some Colorado tomato sauce and help butcher a local hog.  Needless to say, our pantry and freezer and bellies are full, but not the bank account or vacuum cleaner.

Piece by Piece

It's quite elevating to dine here.

Many days I think it will be at least 20 years before we finish our house.  It is going so slowly right now.  That can get depressing for me.   I love nothing more than COMPLETING projects.  But it feels as though life is strongly working against us completing the house.  We need money, so Scott has to work elsewhere.  We have two small children.   Here is my what I've learned: only crazy people have their second child and build a home in the same year.  

But then, our sage friend and cabinet builder, Mitch, came by to install our (new, spacious, gorgeous) pantry and he helped me.  "You are not sitting at the kid's table anymore!  You have some siding up!  It's looking good around here!"   

"Seriously, Mitch?  We have a long way to go and we are so tired.  Especially Scott."

"Megan, you just have to put up one piece of wood at a time.  One piece of wood, and then another,  and another.  You WILL get there."

And now I think this every day: One Piece Of Wood.  I think it will be less than 20 years.  Maybe 15??

Siding is starting!!!

Inlaws and Outlaws

For two reasons I feel like a cheat when saying we live in 629 square feet.  One: The Garage.  Two: Nana's Casita.  

First, the Garage.  Our cars don't dream of rolling in under our house.  It's for our bikes and tools and washer and dryer and camping gear and dry food storage.  In our small house priorities, these things seem more worthy of precious cover than our cars.  Besides, I've lived in snow country my entire life and never parked under cover.  Why spoil myself now!  When we designed our place, finding a spot for a washer upstairs meant trading for precious cabinet space.  Walk my laundry down to the garage?  No problem!  It's not like it's across town or anything.  Besides, it give me a reason to go outside.  Evidently, 50 years ago, the garage was a common location for the laundry center.  But now the laundry keeps getting closer and closer to the bedroom....I'm not kidding.  Homes are now being designed with washers and dryers in the walk-in-closets.  I guess it's good cover for the bed squeaking...hee hee.

Another major reason I feel a bit disingenuous describing our house as small is Nana's Casita.  In a previous post I mentioned we remodeled the back of the existing house next to us to fit a small studio apartment for my mom to stay in.  With its own entrance directly across from our front door, we wake up and look out to see if the other has parted her curtains to signal a welcome.  Then, either I send Mason over to say good morning or she comes over for coffee.  She stays there about twice a week (she lives in Yampa).  While other homes accommodate their guests in a bonus room, we had the opportunity to create a totally separate zone.  It has its own bathroom and kitchenette,  and its own heat we can turn on or off as needed.  Best of all, it stays clean and free from my propensity to fill it with miscellanea!

I will say it has been stressful trying to complete our own house and hers at the same time.  Needless to say, neither is done!  But, we'll get there.  Hers is done enough to have her pals over for wine and  give us the opportunity to yell, "Keep it down over there!"

I think a lot about auxiliary space--living space not connected to your main house that you can use when you need it, but not all the time.  You only have to heat, clean, attend to it when you use it.  Rather than everyday.   My mom loves her casita because she can be close to us but doesn't feel as intrusive as if she was IN our house (in our case, on the couch).  She has her freedom, and we have her!  Which is priceless!

The next auxiliary space I am dreaming over: an old camper retrofitted to be our library.  Imagine that!  "I am headed outside to the library.  See you in a couple hours....."

Mama Got a Brand New Job

A list of future posts about our lives in our little house sits next to our computer, undeveloped.   So many entertaining things are happening!  But all I've been able to do is keep adding ideas, rather than write about them.  Yes, against my better judgement, I got a job outside of our construction company and property managment company and child raising company.  I got this job because I need a way to pay for preschool and daycare. My wish: two days a week to myself when I can FINISH OUR HOUSE  and NURTURE OUR BUSINESS.  The daycare expense of these two days: $800 a month.  Whew!

I have yet to spend one day doing these sought after tasks.  Isn't that life?  You start with one desire, and the hoops you jump through--the journey--become the thing that consumes you.  Much more so than the original goal.  At least that is how I feel right now.  Caught in the logistics.  Memorizing menus, martinis, and mercurial staff.  Shuttling the kids from me to Scott each afternoon.  Trying to keep myself and the family balanced, rested, fed, nurtured.

After nearly two months, I feel we are close to getting in a groove.  Which will include me posting some fun stuff on the blog--hopefully photos of my progress on the house!  Thanks for staying tuned.

Emotional Downsizing

I sold my Harley today.  I never really thought this day would come.  I won this beauty in a raffle in 1998 with a ticket purchased by my mom as a Christmas Gift.  Seriously.  The kicker is that I had yearned for a motorcycle for over half my life, and was in the process of buying one when the good universe delivered this to me nearly free of charge.  This bike was loaded with symbolism for me--of luck and gratitude and freedom and independence.  And then, of the challenge of letting things go.

Once I learned how to ride a motorcycle this big, I rode it quite a bit--but never enough.  I put her in the back of my truck and went to Alabama with my dog.  I rode the Fall River Road through Rocky Mountain National Park with a boyfriend on the back.  I spent time in Southern Colorado cruising through farm land.  I traveled to a friend's wedding in Winter Park, experiencing true cold weather riding.  I had leather chaps and steel toed boots.   In other words, I was a single lady with no small children!

Based on how my mother is, I figured that being a mother would mean obsession with keeping my kids alive.  I never anticipated it would spill over into a need to keep me and my husband alive.  Mason came out of me and I knew I could never ride that beautiful bike again.  I wouldn't be the mother who died on her motorcycle.  But, how to let it go?

A man wanted to buy it.  I sold it.  I watched it drive away from me on a trailer.  I cried a lot.  Not really about the bike, because I hadn't ridden it in over 8 years (gulp!).  I cried about what the bike meant to me and represented about me. I cried about the memories and the fantasy of driving down the road whenever I want to.  By myself.  I churned through all the ideas and emotions that were preventing me from letting go of something I never used.  Then, I thought about the two little boys and grown man who are my world.   And I felt clear.

Stay-at-Homesteading

8 pounds!  Rhubarb Jam anyone?

Ready for winter in 09

Good thing our neighborhood allows clothes lines!

I was at a party a few months ago, and when a woman asked me what my job is,  I answered, "I'm a stay-at-homesteader." She replied, "you must have chickens!" Well, I don't have chickens (yet), but it did get me thinking about what I mean by calling myself this. After all, it's a pretty heady designation given that  I don't live on anything close to a ranch or farm. Or have any edible livestock cavorting in the back yard. (If you don't count the cat, who I consider barbecuing sometimes.  Just kidding, Luna!)

For me, this all started when I was home with my first son, and was deeply confused about what I was doing with my life--I had left my career behind to do what???  I felt completely lost. My self-concept changed for the better for two reasons:  I had unconditional support from my Mom and Husband,  and I read an interview with  a woman named Shannon Hayes.  She wrote a book called  Radical Homemakers: Reclaiming Domesticity from a Consumer Culture. 
The publisher's description: "Mother Nature has shown her hand. Faced with climate change, dwindling resources, and species extinctions, most Americans understand the fundamental steps necessary to solve our global crises-drive less, consume less, increase self-reliance, buy locally, eat locally, rebuild our local communities.In essence, the great work we face requires rekindling the home fires.Radical Homemakers is about men and women across the U.S. who focus on home and hearth as a political and ecological act, and who have centered their lives around family and community for personal fulfillment and cultural change. It explores what domesticity looks like in an era that has benefited from feminism, where domination and oppression are cast aside and where the choice to stay home is no longer equated with mind-numbing drudgery, economic insecurity, or relentless servitude.Radical Homemakers nationwide speak about empowerment, transformation, happiness, and casting aside the pressures of a consumer culture to live in a world where money loses its power to relationships, independent thought, and creativity. If you ever considered quitting a job to plant tomatoes, read to a child, pursue creative work, can green beans and heal the planet, this is your book." 


 Hell, this is not my book, this is my life!  The cover even has a buffed out lady waiving a rolling pin in the air in a power salute!  Oh yeah!


So, for me, Radical Homemaking and Stay-at-Homesteading, means unplugging in as many ways as I can from having to buy things, so that I am not pressured to make money.  It means living in a 629 square foot house.  It means energy efficiency.  It means pulling the boys in the bike trailer all around town.  It means working at the gym day-care so we don't have to pay for a membership.  It means washing diapers, making my own wet-wipes, and  growing my own potatoes and rhubarb.  It means canning and freezing and preserving as many things as I can to see us through winter.  It means kissing and thanking and thanking my Husband and Mom for helping bring in the money so I can pursue my radical life.  And, one day soon, it may mean chickens.  Or not.  Luna may have other plans for the chickens.